Mille Tendresse
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Audrey Hepburn being the most adorable cupcake ever at the 28th Academy Awards in 1956
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Le manoir des chats ailés/ Mewingham Manor
2002
Artist : Laura von Stetina
(via duhrose)
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(via la-femme-enrouge)
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This weekend I was told a story which, although I’m kind of ashamed to admit it, because holy shit is it ever obvious, is kind of blowing my mind.
A friend of a friend won a free consultation with Clinton Kelly of What Not To Wear, and she was very excited, because she has a plus-size body, and wanted some tips on how to make the most of her wardrobe in a fashion culture which deliberately puts her body at a disadvantage.
Her first question for him was this: how do celebrities make a plain white t-shirt and a pair of weekend jeans look chic? She always assumed it was because so many celebrities have, by nature or by design, very slender frames, and because they can afford very expensive clothing. But when she watched What Not To Wear, she noticed that women of all sizes ended up in cute clothes that really fit their bodies and looked great. She had tried to apply some guidelines from the show into her own wardrobe, but with only mixed success. So - what gives?
His answer was that everything you will ever see on a celebrity’s body, including their outfits when they’re out and about and they just get caught by a paparazzo, has been tailored, and the same goes for everything on What Not To Wear. Jeans, blazers, dresses - everything right down to plain t-shirts and camisoles. He pointed out that historically, up until the last few generations, the vast majority of people either made their own clothing or had their clothing made by tailors and seamstresses. You had your clothing made to accommodate the measurements of your individual body, and then you moved the fuck on. Nothing on the show or in People magazine is off the rack and unaltered. He said that what they do is ignore the actual size numbers on the tags, find something that fits an individual’s widest place, and then have it completely altered to fit. That’s how celebrities have jeans that magically fit them all over, and the rest of us chumps can’t ever find a pair that doesn’t gape here or ride up or slouch down or have about four yards of extra fabric here and there.
I knew that having dresses and blazers altered was probably something they were doing, but to me, having alterations done generally means having my jeans hemmed and then simply living with the fact that I will always be adjusting my clothing while I’m wearing it because I have curves from here to ya-ya, some things don’t fit right, and the world is just unfair that way. I didn’t think that having everything tailored was something that people did.
It’s so obvious, I can’t believe I didn’t know this. But no one ever told me. I was told about bikini season and dieting and targeting your “problem areas” and avoiding horizontal stripes. No one told me that Jennifer Aniston is out there wearing a bigger size of Ralph Lauren t-shirt and having it altered to fit her.
I sat there after I was told this story, and I really thought about how hard I have worked not to care about the number or the letter on the tag of my clothes, how hard I have tried to just love my body the way it is, and where I’ve succeeded and failed. I thought about all the times I’ve stood in a fitting room and stared up at the lights and bit my lip so hard it bled, just to keep myself from crying about how nothing fits the way it’s supposed to. No one told me that it wasn’t supposed to. I guess I just didn’t know. I was too busy thinking that I was the one that didn’t fit.
I thought about that, and about all the other girls and women out there whose proportions are “wrong,” who can’t find a good pair of work trousers, who can’t fill a sweater, who feel excluded and freakish and sad and frustrated because they have to go up a size, when really the size doesn’t mean anything and it never, ever did, and this is just another bullshit thing thrown in your path to make you feel shitty about yourself.
I thought about all of that, and then I thought that in elementary school, there should be a class for girls where they sit you down and tell you this stuff before you waste years of your life feeling like someone put you together wrong.
So, I have to take that and sit with it for a while. But in the meantime, I thought perhaps I should post this, because maybe my friend, her friend, and I are the only clueless people who did not realise this, but maybe we’re not. Maybe some of you have tried to embrace the arbitrary size you are, but still couldn’t find a cute pair of jeans, and didn’t know why.
This post is one of those things that I will reblog every time it appears on my dash. This is so important, and no one ever tells you about it.
I almost didn’t read this but then I did and I’m really glad that I did.
I think about this post a lot.
(via essenceofrose)
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Might be controversial with the tumblr crowd but something that ive learned both as a teen on the internet, as an adult who’s done management & just worked a job, and through observation of other peoples lives and problems, if a person tells you that “EVERYBODY says (negative thing) about them and they dont know why”, “everybody” is right, and they Do know why, and those words are your cue to become involved with this person as little as possible.
When my coworkers said he got fired from his last job for being late and that it was “totally unreasonable”, i wasn’t surprised when he showed up 5-15 minutes late to every shift. When one of the people i managed last summer said that when she worked her last job everyone said she wasnt a hard worker and worked too slow and she thought it was unfair and confusing, I wasn’t surprised when she had severe performance issues. When my friend told me her new boyfriend said all his exes were crazy, i wasn’t surprised when he turned out to be the crazy one. When a boy at my college said no girl would give him a chance and he didnt know why, i wasn’t surprised when he was a misogynist. When one of my friends in early high school said everyone kept abandoning them and calling them manipulative and controlling i Was surprised when they were toxic and manipulative and controlling, and i felt extreme guilt for “abandoning them” and joining a list of people who just wouldnt stick around, but i learned, and it was a lesson that stuck. I dont feel guilty anymore. I didnt abandon them, i broke off the friendship because they were a hurtful, mean person who refused to change their behavior. I learned to listen when people say what their personality flaws are. A lot of the time they’ll tell you themselves. People very rarely dip from someones life without a word- theres boundaries crossed, explanations of hurtful behavior that are ignored to shield the perpetrators emotions and ego, the reasons are never missing, they just are ignored to fit a different, self victimizing narrative.
If everybody around you has the same problem with you, the problem doesn’t lie with everyone else.
(via selfmadeandsoft)
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Be the reason people still believe in kind hearts, authentic vibes and warm souls.
(via lovelyth0ughts)
